brendanthesalty:

Straight people actually haven’t existed since 2010 when Lady Gaga and Beyoncé murdered the last remaining straights in that diner.

official-canadianjesus:

roman-sunshine:

Beetles compromise 25% of all animal species. That means 1 in 4 animals is probably a beetle. Is it you? Is it your best friend? How can you be sure?

Ringo could be living in your backyard without you even knowing

deohsogay:

scoping out if it’s safe to come out to someone

eddythebearcat:

oreoprince:

this has got to be THE funniest sentence ive seen all day im gonna cry

Me getting my name called to get my order at Starbucks

whitestmexicanyouwillknow:

tenfandoms:

timesarehardfornewsies:

girls-who-love-stars:

lostenemies:

list of men i trust:

• john mulaney
• andy samberg

• Terry Crews

• Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

• Tom Holland

• Lin-Manuel Miranda

john cena

Nick offerman

bitchycode:

‪What part of “i don’t wanna spend anymore money” don’t I understand