you know that vine that’s like “my resting heart rate registers as a panic attack”? That is the BIG MOOD rn, I went to go for a walk earlier and before I even stepped outside my heart rate was 130! And just walking at an average pace for 15 mins had it shoot up past 160 with chest pain and feeling faint and that is Not Normal. I have no reason to be anxious, it’s just a ~wonderful~ thing that comes with panic disorder. Surprise anxiety!

anyway this has been happening for a few weeks so I finally gave in and took one of my valiums and I feel soooooo relaxed right now. My god. Like I could do anything without fear rn. Is this what normal feels like?? I want normal